As a personal trainer, my goal has been to help people love their bodies no matter where they are at on the journey. But as someone who has lost 80lbs, I also know the mental battle you go through. Because of that, I remind myself to always be careful with what I say and they way I act. Weight loss is HARD! It takes time and sometimes when you meet a person, they make look out of shape but in fact have lost a ton of weight!
After having my youngest son 2 years ago, I struggled to lose the baby weight! I had health issues before he was born, plus spent half my pregnancy too sick to workout, so I just assumed my struggle was due to that. I thought I wasn’t balancing eating healthy, working out and nursing. I tried not to beat myself up and focus on the good….like the fact I was lifting heavier weights than ever before! Slowly I lost all the baby weight, but still had a good 10 lbs to go to pre pregnancy weight. Then I got sick AGAIN and found out I actually had an autoimmune disease that made weight loss extremely hard! I felt justified in that my hard work wasn’t paying off for a good reason!!!
The past two months, we have been working to find a good thyroid medicine and the first was a huge miss. The new one I started last week after discovering I had gained 10lbs from the previous medicine. Normally that would upset me, but I knew why and I knew I was doing everything I can. Instead of focusing on the scale right now, I’m more focused on my health!!!
It’s still a VERY sensitive subject for me and a lot of time I don’t tell people I’m a personal trainer when I meet them as I feel a bit fluffy and I can’t stand the “body scan” people give you. The other day, I was leaving the park when I encountered a fit lady carrying a kettlebell. Before getting a chance to say ANYTHING, she launched into “I’m a trainer, I do classes here, you should sign up, etc etc etc”….I could hardly get a word in with her trying to sell me on her classes, which sounded GREAT but relationship building is key, not sales! I finally got a work in to say I was a trainer too and have been for years and love it. Her reply….sometimes trainers fall off track and need help from others to get back in shape….ouch!!!!
Words hurt people. They do. Even when we mean well, and I know she did, you have to be careful. You never know what someone is going through. I’ve lost 80lbs, I have 3 kids under the age of 6, my husband is never home, and I battle an invisible disease. I’m AWESOME and proud of all I’m able to do!!! But that conversation had me doubting myself. It made me self conscious and upset again that I can’t get my body to cooperate. I reminded myself over and over I’m doing what I can and I just have to be patient, but the words still hurt.
Remember to never ever ever ever EVER judge anyone. You never know what someone has been through, or what they are going through right now!! Many people fight battles we can’t see, and one kind word can make a huge difference! Always focus on the good, you could make someones whole day!